“I am Thee In-Flight Hostess Twinkie with a final boarding announcement,
The Game of Thrones is already won.
Have you found your assigned Night of the Apocalypse partner?
If you haven’t, it’s too late loves, the show is about to commence,
if you choose not to hold the sweaty palm of the one next to you,
then you’re on your own for the remainder of this flight.
Smoke this, take one of those, have another reel around the fountain.
Now. Everyone, remotes up, Netflix on.
Ignore the burning dog-hair smell, it’s only Cerberus and Orthrus,
coming to take us away, haha, heehee, hoho.
Would Mr. Leonard Cohen please turn off the Jeff Buckley,
the Captain can’t hear the laugh-track
over the sounds of gnashing teeth and wailing coming from coach.
Thank you for flying with us here at The Virgin’s Airlines.
We hope you enjoy your flight today with us.”